Wednesday, June 29, 2016

4 month update

Hello guys and dolls! 

Well we are here at June 29 and that means that I am 4 days past the 4 month mark of my keto year. I know now after the first 4 months that there will never be any going back for me as far as eating the SAD diet again, Keto is just the thing that makes me feel too good to quit. 

That said, I have not really had a month of roses the last while. Even after my post about re affirming myself to this WOE I found there was still something that I was having an impossible time putting down. 
Alcohol in general actually, not that I am an every day heavy drinker, I just have had a big issue with telling myself that I can not have it at all. So I have not yet decided to give it up. I am going 30 days to see if it really makes a large difference in my weight loss. The science says that it should. I will not be pushing myself out of keto to burn the booze first. That is just logic. 

I had to ask myself why though, I can give up sugar, I can give up starch. I LOVE chips more than you can possibly imagine and yet I can walk past an open bag now without thinking about It. I am not addicted to booze, I am addicted to the idea of it being a treat.  A forbidden fruit that I can slam into my daily macros without feeling too bad about it. 
I have been on this whole " well I deserve this" mind set about it. Really, that is not being true to the experiment . The idea is to be ketogenic, not low carb. 

 ( forgive any weird typing.. There is a kitten chasing my fingers as I am typing ). 
 So yesterday we had date night, We went for Mexican and I fully planned to stay on plan the whole night. I failed. I made a choice about it and I had no issue getting back on the keto wagon today. No MENATAL issue I should say. 
It was so not worth it. I had a lot of time today to examine the walls of the bathroom at work. I felt horrible and bloated all day and no food would agree with me. I didn't go near my scale because I know better. 
I have found those days are sneaking in more and more the last little while so no more. I have been so against tracking as I just want this to be part of my life and I don't want to give it much thought during the day but my resolve has not grown to that point yet. 
I am taking a page out of Mary Roberts book  ( you are my hero Mary seriously) after watching her keto coaching episodes.  I am an addict plain and simple .  So I need to keep the message forefront all the time and top of mind. I am rewatching all the you tube videos I can find in keto world. Any suggestions would be wonderful. I am literally eating and breathing keto information, as well as examining the rest of my life and decided how I can be happier in it. 

The sad truth is that I can never walk by a mirror without looking to see if I look round and lumpy. It is a mind set that I have never been able to master, to love myself the way I am , because I don't. I am not happy in my 50lb too heavy body and I do not think that has anything to do with self worth. I think the opposite, I value myself enough to change. 

I believe part of me has been scared of the change and the success. I think there has been a bit of self sabotage . It is not all about weight loss for me as I have said before but of course that is our marker of sucess . I believe that the first 4 months have been largely getting my head right. Yes I have seen good results, I am down 15 pounds now, but I feel like I have been in training and now I really want to see what this body can do . It is still summer for 2 months, I want to wear a 2 piece! . Ramble post tonight. Be well my keto peeps


Sunday, June 12, 2016

Why I keto, Affirmation

So Last night was the relay for life in town. 12 hours of walking a relay track in support of cancer research. It is a powerful night, I always forget just how powerful until I go, This was my 8th year going.

We got down to the track and set up our tent with our horde of snack foods and the relay kicked off. As usual I was mediocre about the whole event, It is very emotional for me as I have lost my dad at a young age to cancer. We were very close. OK so I don't want much to get into that as I have just spent an entire night dwelling in it. I found though that there was a different side effect this year.

I watched the people , walking their miles in deep contemplation of life, solid in their choice to make this small stand and fight all night through sore legs and tired eyes. They had their reason, they hate the disease. They want freedom from it like every on else.

And then they stop at the tents for their muffins, power bars, Gatorade, etc. I watched them pour the poison right back in. The very thing they fought against all night they hungrily engulfed to keep going.

The irony was painful and sad. I found no joy in that.

Then my daughter got up on a stage in front of the whole relay and pledged 300.00 of her own money and had her head shaved in support. She is 13, she didn't care at all for how it looked or what anyone thought, she just needed to make the stand.

Ok so that was one of the proudest moment of my life, this is really personal to me, This is actually why I keto.

I have been more than touched by this disease, my family is on a genetic research list for the province of BC due to the high instance of cancer we have. I had a hysterectomy at age 25 and was put to early menopause due to pre cancerous cells.

It is easy to forget in day to day life, but I had a hard affirmation last night that I NEED to be here, to see this young woman through. I was only 10 years older than her when I lost my dad.

I can get caught in the vanity , I can get caught in the numbers but as Brian Williamson says in the Ketovangelist podcast often, You have to know your WHY. Well my WHY is to never have to be one of the luminary bags glowing in memory at the side of the track. I never want my kid to walk behind the pipe band for the silent lap and remember that I was a vibrant soul. I may not be able to control it all but that can NOT be my legacy. So , I keto and I will Keto on. I am a believer that it is the thing I can do to secure my best odds to not have to go down that road.

Cheers all and good eats.. I am heading for a coffee.... with FAT!


Thursday, June 9, 2016


I am eternally frustrated today, which has caused me to get a little real with myself. I got on the scale today when I woke up feeling really puffy and gross.  Sure Enough, back up to 173. Fuck . 

I know where the culprit lies, it's alcohol. I had wine at a bbq last night but that was not a one off thing. I have been drinking a lot, I went and bought gin thinking that ok this is more keto friendly but yeah, it's still alcohol. I need to get back to my have a beverage on Friday night routine and be done with it because seriously this is messing with my body and messing with my progress. I feel super puffy today. :(.

The other thing is I was at a bbq last night. I was good , very good with what I ate but I have no idea what was in the burgers as they were home made, I really don't now if they used bread to bind them or there were other sneaky carbs in there. SO as I am writing this I am going to stop beating myself up quite so much. It is 6:30 am so please forgive my grammar and sentence structure. I am assuming it won't be the best currently. 

So yes, current weight, 173 post holiday pudge. 



Sunday, June 5, 2016


Have not blogged in awhile. Frankly I fell off the wagon a bit. I can admit that. Work has been so stressful with big and changes and what not that I have been drinking way too much wine. Way too much. I did manage in the last month to lose about 2 pounds but I think that was largely due to simple lack of calories .

The wine kicked me out of ketosis and it was havok on my blood sugar and on my mental state. Found that I was having carb cravings again . I found that all the benefits and feelings of we'll being were leaving me and I was feeling defeated .

I have recommitted  quietly. Giving up the wine . Finding peace and my center. Refocusing on the goals I have. I am also doing a 30 day face project. I know I have a chin I would like to find it. I feel I am on the path to finding some peace in my life . I know I would like to make Keto my career and I am not sure what that looks like yet. I think I would like to take on clients, but before I am ready to do that I need to be a success in my own journey. That is 47 pounds from now . So I am refocusing on me.

Cheers and peace kids


Friday, May 6, 2016

Update at the 9 week mark

Good Morning Cats and Kittens,

Well I sure have a lot of catch up to do! I am terribly sorry I have been so slack on posting the last while, lots of life happening and really I didn't have anything to report. Things were plugging along as usual.

So I am down to 168 lbs now. Slow loss compared to a lot but it is enough to make me happy.

I bought a ketone meter and was thrilled to see that I had been getting something right as my numbers were at 1.8 mmol. There was something through that has been bothering me more than anything. My energy. No matter how good I feel and how much I can get done in the day once I am up, I cant get up in the morning, been slow and sluggish. I finally decided after listen to Maria Emmerich's book Keto adapted, it was likely that the antidepressants that I have been on for Fibromyalgia have been the culprit. I am now coming off of them. This is proving to be a hard thing to do.

Currently my brain feels like I had 7 Gin and Tonic, When I move my head around the world swims. I have started taking 5htp to combat the drop in serotonin levels. Besides, It is Friday and I at least have the weekend to recoup.

So this is the progress to date. I have to admit it sure looks like more than 12 pounds! I love the way my skin is feeling healthier and just in general I LOOK so much healthier.

Victory of the week. I bought a belt.

This is just a tiny update! I will commit to posting more often guys!

Thanks for reading

Cheers and good eats.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

March 29- the body is a very odd thing

Good Spring day all!

First of all it is the most beautiful day out here in BC today, 16 degrees outside , I am sorry I have no idea what that is in anything other than celcius but I promise it was warm and wonderful.

So this morning I got up and decided for fun I would get on the scale, you see this has previously been fun.. a preview as to what this week's weight will be. I have not really been able to solidly decide on a good weigh day, but I think Fridays because it is the start to the weekend. Well this morning I hopped on the scale to find out I have not lost any weight at all last week but I actually gained 2 pounds. 173 was glaring up at me like a snake!

Now after I thought about trashing the scale, I thought for a minute, I have been very sick with a cold. Still getting over the cough part of it. I had to take all kinds of medication and even though it was a caplet and no sugar, I believe it messed around with the body anyway. My hands were so puffy this morning my rings would hardly move and my belly was puffy , my face was puffy. I was a gigantic water balloon.

I still feel puffy even after the whole day of drinking lots of water, I think that really the medication messed me up. I have eaten on plan all week except for a couple nights where I drank whiskey in my tea instead of using cold medication.

I have also had a high stress week. My ex husband is in town to visit the family and although we play nice, it causes me stress to have him around. This likely means I am not sleeping as well and I am probably producing all sorts of coritsol. Thanks body, you are just my bestest buddy.

So what can I say, I guess given that this is a life change, there are going to be times that I am not going to have the best week. I know where my anxiety is coming from. This is the spot, the place that I always get to with any weight loss plan.. about 10 pounds and then I start rewarding my good behavior with food. The lowest weight that I have been in the last 20 years ( I am 36) is 158lbs. I am only 5 foot 3 so that was still alot of weight on me. I hold it mostly on my stomach and chest, not the legs or face for the most part.

The highest weight I have seen is 200 but that was post baby. I was 215 at the time I delivered. Needless to say 158 is my first goal. When I get under that I can sit back and say " ok, on a path ". I am so determined and motivated! I will stay the course the whole 365 project , probably longer.

Ok anyway, enough wallowing, yes I gained 2 pounds .. big hairy deal. moving on.

Have been having some kitchen fun this week and I am thinking I may start a food page on this blog but for now I want to share my latest delights.

Green Thai curry soup

and my new fab " no mac and cheese casserole "

oh my god it was soo good. And I have food for the next couple days. I have little to no hunger, I am not totally sure if I am all the way fat adapted or not yet, I have ordered a blood testing meter and I am excited to have it arrive so I can see where I am at.

For the time being I am trying to remember that I am still in education mode, watching as many documentaries as I can and ready great books like " why we get fat and what to do about it "

if any of you are amazon shoppers you can do a girl a solid and use the blog links to shop! I get a bit of a monetary bonus for anyone who buys something through my links.

Anyway kids I am into my latest documentary " the perfect human diet " Found it on google play and looks interesting so I am going to tuck up and finish the knitting project I am supposed to be doing right now and watch my movie. Kids are out and the man is having carby beers in his back yard with a buddy. Its an all me night and I intend to enjoy it.. without snacks!

Have a great night, sent with love from puffy fingers!


Friday, March 25, 2016

March 25- One month in and the internal renovation

Good afternoon all,

I have dragged my butt to the computer to post today because it is a very special day! I have made it a month! I have done this before but NEVER without cheating. I have done this with no cheats and a motivation and mindfullness that I was lacking before.
Her are the official one month photos!

And the "hide nothing " photos.

Ok so wow. yep those are pictures of me in my underwear.. on the internet. ok, I can live with this.

SO I do have something interesting to talk about today though, I had a real emotional crisis over my reflection today. I am sick to begin with and of course we are always a little emotional when we are sick but, even so...

SO I took my daughter out to buy shorts and a swim suit top today and I was for once not dreading going into the clothing store, I was thinking that there may be things I might actually feel ok wearing. But, when I was standing outside the change room waiting for her I caught my reflection from the side. I had terrible posture, I still looked so heavy , tummy poked out and pudgy arms peeking out from my shirt. Jeans sliding down my non existent bum to make the belly look even bigger.

I was devastated. I had been feeling so good on my one month day. It was a very hard thing for a few minutes but then it hit me. I didn't get here over night like we all say. It is not going to go away over night. I can imagine what that reflection would have been 30 days and almost 10 pounds ago. I know that I may be a slow loser due to the hormones I am on. I am feeling like a person I remember .

In the end I managed to talk myself out of eating a cinnamon bun from the bakery across the mall , bought the kiddo a really cute top and high waist shorts. I am looking forward now to what my 2 month results will be.

oh my god , the other thing driving me a little nuts are the hot flashes! I do not know if it is because of my hormones or just that i have stored estrogen in my fat and I am using it or just the keto flushing that I hear about but, every time I eat high fat food I am getting hot flashes for about an hour afterward.

I take it as my internal fire working, maybe just a ginger thing ! haha

Anyway I would call today bitter sweet, I feel I have made so much progress and my head is so much better. I have killed the carb and sugar cravings, I am working on conquering the emotional aspect of my food addiction. I have to stop and remember that so much of this is work on the inside and the body has to heal as it goes. It can hang on to the weight while it does and when its ready it will let go.
Keep calm and keto on as they say.

More later ,

Cheers and good eats my keto friends!


Monday, March 21, 2016

March 21 - Family Dinner and Fed Up.

Good Afternoon and Happy Spring!

I love the spring, every year I decide I am going to do something ambitious with my beautiful property. Every year I decide that it feels like way to much physical work! I think possibly this year I may just get a garden in. I am having fantasies about growing cauliflower that will not cost me 8.00 at the store.

For those of you who are not from the great white north, we are averaging 8.00 Cauliflower currently and I have not bought one in about 2 months!

I believe the sunshine is making me spring drunk! As Bambi would say I am twitterpated.

Ok enough with the silliness, I had a very interesting day yesterday, I consider it a huge win in the life of this keto girl.

It was my sister and my nephew's birthday, and in the spirit of family I was hosting a dinner for the two of them. I was more than a little concerned about this. My " recovery" from carbs is just 25ish days old. ( I have stopped counting days as I know that March 25 is my monthaversary).

The requested menu was chicken, veggies, potato fries, bread stuffing, then of course there was corn, carrots, pickles and the dessert. A cupcake cake set on a brownie.

I had to cook all of this , prepare the cake and sit down to a feast with 7 people. I am so proud to say that I survived. I did not even really feel much temptation. I did eat some carrots, I had cooked them in garlic and herb butter and they smelled amazing. I was surprised at how sweet they tasted actually. I made a sour cream and cream cheese dip for the veggies and cooked the chicken with half a pound of butter.

Really.. half a pound of butter

There was a request from my lovely fellow ketoers on the Ketogenic Success page to make sure that the picture appeared on the blog so there it is!

I found the bread stuffing to be my biggest challenge. I really love bread stuffing and it is hard to feel like it is a dinner occasion without it but I found that once I just sat and began on my heaps of veg with the sour cream dips and my beautiful buttered chicken I was ok.

I love to cook and so the family dinner prep usually falls to me. I found it was fun to create and smell the foods that were forbidden this time. I was surprised at how much I didn't want to eat them.

So dinner, was a win.

I have a cold. I am fairly whiny when I have a cold. I will admit it is the one thing that will slow me down and turn me into a 5 year old wimp.

As soon as I got rid of my houseguests last night I sat down with my 13 year old to watch Fed UP. I had watched it the other night but I really wanted her to see it.
Both my girls have been asking questions and looking into a Paleo eating plan. I encourage that but I do not feel that they should go full keto. Neither need to lose weight and the energy they put out in a day I think they would feel awful. Besides the fact I do not believe either one of them would be dedicated enough to take the magnesium, drink the water and over salt the food to keep electrolytes up.

She made it half way through the movie and asked me some very interesting questions. One of which was " what is diabetes?" It is a very hard thing to explain to a younger mind. She also wanted to know how thing that were not sugar could BE sugar when you ate them. Again, this was a very hard thing to explain.

I managed to say in simple terms that if it came from a plant or once had a heartbeat you should probably eat it. If you had to open a package , you should probably not eat it. We are going to work together to help the concepts make more sense. I am a big one for encouraging independent thought so it is her choice to do this or not.

Alright, well, I think that is my update for the day. I am very very excited to do my one month weight in this Thursday! I have move my weigh day to Thursday as it makes better sense in my life.

I want to take a second to thank everyone who has let me know they are reading along, it means everything to me. I am an artist and words are one of my best art forms. I believe in what we are all doing through the health of Keto. I am happy to share my journey with you. Thank you so much for letting me know that you have been sharing it with me.

Cheers and good eats.

- Ginger

Saturday, March 19, 2016

March 19 - Fed Up and lettuce enchiladas

Hello cats and kittens!

I passed my exam! I wrote until 1 am last night but when I finally finished and submitted, ended with 72%. Not perfect but a pass and I will take it!.

2 more to go before I can call myself a certified financial planner!. It has never been my ambition to be this but for my job it will open all the doors I need to maximize my job there and go for the bigger positions. I seem to not be able to settle for where I am when I know there is a higher level to reach, even if I kick myself for it later.

I had a few glasses of wine afterwards, I am thinking this is something I need to dial back on a bit, Make sure I am just having a glass or three on Fridays and not the rest of the week. I have always been a wine drinker, as a foodie it is just par for the course. The thing is every time that I do, I pause the ketosis process in my body as it has to burn the alcohol sugar first. It is not really hurting per say, but it is slowing and pausing the healing process that my body is trying to go through.

So, I think I am getting a cold, my man is down with one and I thought I was going to avoid it but then tonight.. poof, my nose is running and I have a headache, hallmark cold symptoms for me. Oh well, not the end of the world, irritating with a nose piercing but hey guess I did that one to myself!

But, given that I am feeling slightly under the weather I have tossed my plan of cleaning out my closet while listening to my daughter and her 13 year old bestie giggle in the other room beside me. I am instead watching " FED UP" which is one of the best documentaries on sugar effects I have seen ever. I have watched it before but I was feeling the need for a reminder after going to the movies this afternoon and narrowly avoiding popcorn.

I made myself the most wonderful dinner to go with it, Lettuce enchiladas.. not from a book, I just played with food and that was what I produced. I made a guacamole for the inside and grass fed ground beef from my Uncle's ranch. Then I made cheese crisps and a siracha sour cream to put on top, was so amazing. The only thing I was missing was cilantro.

I added cream cheese to the ground beef and cooked it in butter to make sure I got the fat ratio in there. The grass fed beef is delicious but naturally lean due to how well it is fed so you have to add fat.

Anyway that is today's update, I have noticed the scale is going up and down daily , I am not concerned about that as I am feeling smaller daily as well, so strange this ketogenic world.

My goal after being keto for 8 weeks will be to give up diet pop. It is an issue for me. I have limited it alot but I am still not able to quite let it go. For tonight it is time to knit and watch movies and listen to my perfect kiddo laugh with her best friend. Life is good today, plus there is a ladybug living in my bedroom. The pagan in me thinks this is a wonderful sign of more good to come.

Good night all,

cheers and good eats!

Friday, March 18, 2016

March 18. End of week three- Exploring true hunger

Hello Cat and Kittens!

For the last couple days I have been very careful about carbs. I mean I have been very into not tracking my levels for the first 20 days or so but now I am trying to get a little more dillegent about tracking them. The issue I have is that I do not like to track electronically. I find that it feels like a chore to me. So my solution is that of a typical writer. I have turned to the pen and paper. I got myself a wonderful little day planner and this has evolved for me into so much more than a food tracker.

This is a typical kinda of day. Each day I also set an emotional goal for myself. This is mainly so that I can have a focus that will keep me from eating emotionally.

I had an interesting experience today though, I left it too long. Was a typical day I had my coffee with English double cream and then later I had a cup of hot broth with butter and another coffee later. I am currently studying for an exam so I didnt take any time out of my day to eat any actual food. All was well, I didn't feel hungry through any of that time Then, at about 5:30 I noticed I was really wonky. My hands were trembly and I was having a hard time focusing. My keto pizzazz was all but gone and I really really needed food.

The strangest thing about all of it was I still had no growley stomach signs of hunger, my body had no idea that it needed food, well at least not my stomach. I wonder if this is what they are talking about when talking about true hunger, the body's need for sustinace ? I have never had hunger that wasn't fully insulin driven. I felt a million percent better after I ate but I learned a lesson. I am not yet stable enough to go so long without food. I do not know if it was a sugar thing, or an electrolyte thing.

I am not diabetic but I do have pre diabetic symptoms so possibly that was it, a sugar drop of sorts.


Oh hey, I also got all my " before" pics back. I can not believe I am about to post them on the internet but here is my fav.. I can not wait to show the after in Feb 2017

It was good to do pics that made me feel pretty. I feel amazing on the WOE. Not sure what else to write at this point, better go back and study up. I have to pass this thing for work... tonight..

Cheers and good eats folks

Tuesday, March 15, 2016

March 15 Day 20- what the whoosh was that & New Name.

Good afternoon Cats and Kittens,

Well there have been a few interesting developments in the Keto Project over the last few days.

I will start with Saturday, Went out to a dive bar show with my boy, got all dolled up in my best leather and plaid and out we went.
Had a great night! I was the Driver so my night was all diet coke and a bunless burger with Salad for dinner. Burger was so good, Goat cheese and friend onions and veg. I figured it was plenty of food because of course I am getting more and more adapted to eating a ketogenic diet. This means.. I am just not hungry very often.

We stayed out until the small hours and finally got back home about 2 am. Sober as I was, I decided I would like a nice dry glass of red wine. It was weekend, I was way under my carbs for the day having only eaten that wonderful burger. My boy and I turned up the tunes and drank the wine until 6 am. It was a rare night, one for the books and I had so much fund.

Now when I woke a mere 4 hours later because I had to go be a responsible parent, Life was not so rosy.

1) Dehydration does not begin to explain how dry my mouth was. I think I was actually exhaling sand.

2) I simply wanted to die, not enough food to process the alcohol I ingested ( way more than one glass of wine ... )

3) I have never , ever been that hungover in years.

I pulled it together and did what I had to do in the day, out of curiosity I got on the scale to see how badly the sugar alcohols of the wine had effected me.

To my shock and amazement I was down.. overnight.. 3 pounds.

I stood on the scale 3 more times to make sure. it read the same each time 170.3. I could not believe my dry, aching eyes.

I ran of course to my new favorite people on the work on the Ketogenic Success page through facebook. This is apparently called a whoosh. Basically means your fat cells have been filling with water and hiding the fat loss until one day " poof" they let go and deflate you like a water balloon.

Now, when I think back on it, I was freezing cold all day Saturday and I could not get out of the bathroom. I was peeing all day. I suppose that could have been a sign that I was going to woosh. I am never really cold by nature. Peeing all the time, well that is actually pretty typical of me.

So that was Sunday, If I had not been on my death bed I probably would have jumped for joy. As it was I threw up my broth and butter but no matter, my own fault.

I did not eat too much on Sunday, but I was as I stated very dehydrated. I tried to drink and replace water all day but I just felt dry.

Monday rolls around and my insides are not happy. I was bloated and gassy, ( sorry for the visual but I did promise to honest ) . I felt like nothing was right and nothing I drank was helping.

I got home from work and decided to check my ketostix, to my surprise the stick was negative. ok..... So I have not done anything differently. I hit the internet.

Again, I turned to my FB page friends, they assured me this was probably a good thing, my body was adapting to using the ketones I was producing for fuel. The time has gone so fast I guess it is just about the right time frame for that coming up on a month soon.

So again this morning, as today is my usual weigh in day, I jumped on the scales, slightly smug, wanting to see that 170 number again. ... 172.3 Wha????

I have decided the scale is simply a lying liar who lies a lot. Of course I would be up, I have done nothing but drink water for 2 days and my body got so dry it is afraid to let go of any of it. I suspect that in a few days I will let go of the water and all will be well.

So that has been the few days in the Keto project as far as my personal life goes. I have also been listening to the Ketovangelist podcast which I am devouring! With Salt!

I have also changed the name of this site to simply " the Keto Project" because I believe that although austerity is a part of my life now, Ketogenic life is opening mental doors for me that I never knew I needed to open. I need to talk about this and share about this journey. This is all consuming, I need to write about this. The cash part, well it can wait for now. Good night for now Keto Kitties! I will talk to you all soon.

Friday, March 11, 2016

March 11 Day 15

Well, I have a confession to make. I had to withdraw my rainy day account because sadly the rain was falling, In buckets. Too much catch up had to be done from the two months of working part time. So I am back to a literal square one in my nest egg.

I am having a hard time feeling strong today, So much happening on my family front, I have the daunting task of an exam that I have to write Friday for work and there is a job position coming up that I am desperately trying to make them look at me for as it is the holy grail of where I want to get to in the bank.

For about a week I was feeling very up, motivated and on top of the world, this week, with my kiddo acting like a stranger and company in my house on top of it I am feeling like a caged animal, I have also had hunger issues which is surprising to me. Leads me to believe that my body is working on figuring out the new regime as I know I am eating enough.

In any case, been a bit of a rough week but I am holding strong, feel depressed today and very much like I don't want to deal with people. Sucks that my job is totally dealing with people. I am hoping that if I drop off the planet just for a day it will not be too noticed.

on the PLUS side 15 days keto! I am taking a challenge from my favorite Facebook group to not track macros etc for 30 days. Just eat. Eat when hungry , don't when not.

Take the stress out of it.

I am also thinking that next week I am going to take my new found energy and start going to yoga again, if I can seem to get myself out of my head by then. Right now I am in it and not much to be done about it.

Tuesday, March 8, 2016

March 8 day 12

Hello readers,

It seems it may be a trying week. Having kid issues again and causing stress and heartache at home. teenagers are very hard it seems. They think they are adult, I do not agree.
On a plus note I got on the scale today for my weigh in and have a total loss of 6.4 pounds so far. I feel amazing aside from my heart is a little sore.

I do not have a lot to say today just wanted to touch base on the weight weigh in. more later.

Sunday, March 6, 2016

March 6 Day 10

Good Morning all,

I am sure finding that posting every day is a challenge to find the time. Today is Sunday and this weekend has been my first weekend that I have really felt the effects of the keto way of eating. I am a machine, I seem to be unstoppable, I have boundless energy and am in a very good mood. My biggest observation is how calm I seem to feel. I think maybe it is because this no longer feels like a diet choice, it is a lifestyle. I feel amazing and I am over the bad part now.

Compared to the last time I did this, I feel very educated. I have found the most wonderful facebook group called ketogenic success. So much knowledge in that " room" it is a place to celebrate all of the little victories. For example, yesterday I made bread from scratch with my boundless energy.

now, 2 things are interesting about this. First of all, prior to keto I had a really foggy head from my fibromyalgia, I could not for example read a recipie and retain any of it. I had a hard time baking for that reason. Seemed to complicated. I am on medication for the fibro and was still having the head fog issue, I find now 10 days into keto I have been able to read and retain alot more. This is pretty fantastic since I have a course for work that is due on March 20. I am not near done but now that my head works I feel I am able to get going on it.

Second thing interesting about the bread is that I didnt even feel an urge to eat it, I was so satisfied making it... but in doing that I realized I had not eaten all day, I had coffee in the morning but that was it. It was 6 pm when I decided I should make food and really it was hard to eat. Have to be mindful of that one, I do not suppose I can just not eat.

So that part is going well, the money part, well not so much. I have been forced to go over budget a bit. I had only worked part time for the past 2 months and so although this pay check was the one I was going to begin my austerity with, well, I have had to go into what I put away to get a few survivial things. My medication for an example is 64.00... after coverage. I did give in to a few frivolous things too. I dyed my hair, I bought a curling iron. Shampoo conditioner and leave in conditioner. Also, two bread pans.

So I can justify most of it, not the curling iron or hair dye .. karma is a bitch though, I burnt my thumb on the curling iron.

orking on making extra cash though, I am knitting dishcloths for sale. So far I have 75.00 in orders. I have decided to put the money for them right on credit. no point in saving extra money if I owe money. As a financial adviser I KNOW this.

SO I have decided that next pay day I am putting away my cards. Going to put them all in a lock box and then I do not have the ability to go on a spree at walmart because I am bored. I have to control myself a bit and put a bit of a leash on me.

The other thing that was fun that happened was I got back the pictures I had done as my sexy before pictures. Even chubby I still look pretty cute. They made me feel good , I have found I feel sexy and I feel confident just Knowing that I am doing something for myself to better myself.

OH MY GOD, I made a Meatza the other day. it was wonderful. I think I may start a tab for food creations on this page. Maybe down the road. I have alot on my plate these days.

A few goals established this week as well,

The boy and I have been talking about trying to rent and open a gallery space for art, he does amazing alternative photography. I like to model for these types of things and I want a place to sell my wares ( knitted projects and jewelry if I get back into making it ) . My biggest struggle is time management , I seem to never have enough time to do much of anything, Trying hard to boost my income through monetizing the blog and through any avenue I can think of.

It is early days and I have total faith that in a year my life is going to look so much different, in a good way.

Cheers for today, talk soon. Please feel free to comment and share the blog if you know anyone that might benefit from reading along with another's story.

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

March 2/2016 Day 6

Well, I have not been very good at posting every day for the past 5 days, this is largely because I wanted to DIE for most of it. WOW! Carb addiction is an angry angry foe! I feel about a million percent better today though, Feel as though someone lifted the veil and my energy is high!

To be honest my energy is so high I almost am having a hard time sitting still, I have hopes it will level out a bit. Last night I was up with my kid until 11pm and we were baking.

Baking?? yes baking. I did not sample any of what we made, That is not a hardship for me though, I was right on the heels of finally not feeling like I had the worst dehydration and flu of my year. It was an easy thing to not care about the beautiful berry pie that I made.

Confessional time, I did use my MasterCard yesterday. I was at the grocery store and my order came to 4.00 more than what was in my wallet. In hind sight, I really should have just put something back but I had the card there and I used it. I guess what I learned from that one is that I need to take them out of my wallet. If I am every really in an emergency there is nothing that I can not get access to through online banking so really, the cards have to come out. That is what I am going to do tonight. I could not actually bring myself to do it yesterday.

Today will be more difficult. I am down to literally .50 in my wallet. I do not think I need to purchase anything today. I really have all I need, The part that is hard is knowing there are funds in my bank account. Those funds are not for my entertainment though, they have purpose and that purpose is not for me.

Second Confession, I am having a hard time staying off of online banking. It is such a part of my day. I am a financial person and sadly when I am stressed out one of the things that I do is reorganize my budget, try to find better ways and then I end up borrowing from myself.

I have set up a really good automatic payment program that looks after everything, it even transfers to me the cash that is mine. I should actually never have to look unless there is a problem and maybe once on payday to make sure everything went where it was supposed to. I logged in about 6 times yesterday to look. Today will be better.

Ok, I think that does it for my slips ups, well for the first week anyway.

Now, the good news! I had my weigh in this morning, and * drumroll* I am down to 173.8lbs. That is a total loss of 3 pounds in the 6 days I have been doing keto!. I have been really cautious about not eating too much of anything. Not too much protein, not too much snacking on nuts which is very easy to do. My day is usually that I have a couple cups of coffee with heavy cream in the morning, an avocado and some broth with butter for lunch and then I eat a more balanced dinner with veg and protein etc.

I work at a desk job so it is actually easy for me to not eat a whole pile of food while I am working. I feel better to not be full and bloated when I am sitting at my desk.

My biggest challenge is night eating, I am not hungry, I feel my appetite is well in check but I am such a night time snacker. I have found the best thing to do is keep busy and if I really want something I have a bag of peanuts that I can have some of each day. Lots and lots of delicious fat for calories, butter should be its own food group.

So week one is down for all intents and purposes, I am now diving into a study manual for a test I have to write very very soon. Lets call this my stress challenge.

More later.

~ Whiskey,

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Feb 25/16- Day 1

1-Feb 25/2016.

So, I am probably you. 36, Short , fat desk job and broke. I have two kids, a mortgage, too much debt and well here I am living the North American dream.

I have said for years this is not how I see myself when I grow up. Some time in the last little while I looked at my 13 year old who is my youngest and realized that I DID grow up. I am still waiting to make the changes that I know I will have to make in my life to achieve the things I dream about.

So then, A little about me. I have never been the best at follow through. I am a true procrastinator, I have a lot of big ideas ! Big ideas become work and finally then they become passing thoughts that I figure might have been great if I had just kept it up.

My best example of this is money. I work at a financial institution. I spend my days helping people either buy their dream homes or invest for their future. I look at an account that has 800.00 in it and I think “ wow this person is cutting it close on usable cash”

My bank account is currently -745.00. My bills are behind and this is not for lack of making a decent salary.

IF I had stuck to the original financial plan I made for myself about 8 years ago, small savings and no credit. Live on cash and don’t spend what you don’t have. Make a plan for all events and set up automatic payments so that you never have to worry about having enough to pay your bills. Budget and do not spend for fun.

IF I had done this, at 36 I would be a comfortable woman and able to plan some living in my life.
I did not and so the result of that is that I am a slave to my job, working to pay for what I have already spent and emotionally eating to make myself feel better about where my life is at.

Putting this on paper sounds like complete insanity, and my IQ is way too high to keep going this way.

I have come to the conclusion that like every other flimsy dream/goal in my life I have sat back and kinda wanted it to happen but not prioritized it. I have not defined this with a solid start date, end date and rules to live by.

Rules, that is another thing about me, I don’t like them. I don’t like rules even when I am the one who has created them. As an example, I don’t believe in marriage because I feel that suddenly I will no longer have the choice to be in the relationship if I am married, I am then legally bound to be there. This remains true even with my partner who I can not imagine not spending the rest of my life with, I still don’t want to marry him.

I don’t like rules with money, life, work, I generally don’t like anyone telling me how and what I need to do. This I recognize is a bit of a personality flaw and part of my quest for the next year is to stick to the rules I am laying out for myself.

So you get the pictures. I am a stubborn redhead with a few authority issues, a whimsical gypsy mind that is easily distracted and loves loves loves food.

I love me as well, but I am still not the person who I see in my head. I see my reflection and feel like there is a strange bloated sad looking version of me staring back.

I do not need therapy, I do not believe I am depressed , I simply need to do what a million people each year do, make a choice and stick with it through to see some change.

This brings me to the Keto-Cash Project. I have not yet decided if the entire project will stay a secret or simply the fact that I am writing a book to produce at the end of it. I guess, true to form, I simply cant make that choice right now.

The Keto-Cash Project is my personal 365 day experiment with food and money.

We will start with “ keto” Short for Ketogenic diet. I do not like the word diet as it indicates that there will be an end date. I feel physchologically this is a bad thing. Real change has to be felt as a permanent embrace I am told , so I prefer the shortened form of the word.
There is a huge “ Keto “ movement out there in the world right now, Just spend 5 minutes on google after searching the word and you will be transported to a thousand sites of people with seemingly miraculous weight loss and health benefits. I am skeptic by nature when it comes to most things, Truth is though I have done this for 3 months before, I have never ever felt better.

“keto” is fairly simply. Restrict your carbohydrate intake to 20g net carbs a day. Moderate protein and most of your calories from healthy fats.

That’s it, easy right? Well only if you do not get too caught up in the world of macro nutrients and food weighing and supplements. These of course are just fancy words for rules.

Keto has to be monitered to some degree to be successful, you do have to make sure you eat within the carb confines. This is the heart of the whole process, turning your body from something that runs on glucose for fuel ( sugar) and one that runs on your own fat strores.

The science is out there, it is tested and proven. I think that if you are reading this then it is worth your while to go and read a bit of it just to have an understanding of why it works.

As far as I am concerned I have done the research, I have done the reading, I have listened to the podcasts and still do. Now I am simply ready to stop thinking about it and start.
I also am a person with an autoimmune disease and a large predisposition to cancer. I have a complete hysterectomy at 25 to avoid that issue when some nasty cells were found. I have no gall bladder for the same reason.

“Keto” although yet unproven, has shown to have major health benefits when it comes to cancer fighting and inflammation reduction. Simply put, Cancer cells eat sugar- keto has no sugar – keto starves cancer.

I love the thought, I hope they can come up with some studies that prove it soon. I do not believe big Pharma will be happy with the conclusion.

So, these are the reasons that I am doing “keto”. I have 40 pounds to lose and a lot of life I want to live.

Now, on to the Cash part, I want to be able to afford to live all that life. I have looked at the things that I have financed over the last decade, and I am not talking about the big stuff, cars etc, but the stupid little things that rack up your credit cards and then just sit there. I can not tell you anymore what the purchases even are on my cards. I can not tell you where the money went when I took out a loan to refinance.

I am an emotional spender as well. I may as well just face it, I have what one would call an addictive personality driven by instant gratification. I never wait for anything I want it 5 minutes ago.

As Mr Einstien said, “ the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results”.

So I present to you “ The Keto-Cash Project”.
Very simply put, I am going to follow a “keto” food plan and live on cash only for 365 days.

The Rules:

1. Eat a ketogenic meal plan for 365 days starting Feb 25 2016-Feb 24-2017 ( this is a leap year)
2. No cheating. Not even for holidays and high days. I know it is possible to do this as I have done it in the past. There are always ways to make your food ketogenic
3. Document. No holds barred documentation of the process. I will be honest about how I am doing through the entire time. AND, I will continue through to the 365 days.
4. Live on Cash. No credit spending, no debit spending, no borrowing. If I do not physically have the funds then I do not have the ability to purchase what I want.
5. Do not short change bills or family in order to have cash for things. I do not get to put myself in front of adult responsibilities.
6. This is key- Only log into online banking when necessary. I am an addict. I look at my accounts and try to sort out ways to make it more complex and more lucrative all the time. I watch my tiny investments and try to decide if I should take them out. It will not matter because the cash in my wallet is what I will have.
7. Pay down credit cards with any and all extra funds that come my way. I have a budget of 300.00 per month that is my money to spend. That works out to 10.00 per day. Logically that should be enough for any little things. If I decide to go for dinner with the boy well then that is a few days after that I do not spend anything.
Gas is 30.00 a week so that still leaves me with 40.00 for entertainment. Actually that is plenty.

8. Monthly financial recap. I will report the balances on my accounts monthly on the 25th. This will not only help me track my progress but I want to keep this very real.
9. I will make money from any and all sources that I can. I like to knit and so I am sure that I can get my infiknits business off the ground if I really try.
10. I will finish this book, meaning I will stick to this project.

So, there you have it, The Keto Cash Project is on.